May 27, 2011

what NOT to do...

As I mentioned earlier this week, it's been a ROUGH one.
And that was only Tuesday. 
It's Friday now and I am just finally starting to feel the clouds lift a bit.

I am in my first VERY serious relationship.
The kind where you see each other often, without worrying when the next time will be.
The kind where you buy 51 inch Plasma TV's together.
And the kind where you're so comfortable, you start throwing caution to the wind.

I love my boyfriend. And I would venture to say that he is one of the most amazing things that has ever happened to me... but that doesn't always mean that every single day is going to be peachy.
In fact, it means that each day is going to be a new lesson.
A new opportunity to learn how to be a better partner for the person you love.
In short, I have been a little overwhelmed trying to do EVERYTHING right.
But Andy doesn't want that. And neither do I.
I want to do everything in life the way that makes ME comfortable.
If I am happy, he is happy.
And of course, it goes both ways.

Last night I picked up this classic book.
From Andy's bookshelf.
How much do I LOVE that my boyfriend has already read this book?!
So much.
We have actually both decided to read it.
To freshen up.
To learn new forms of communication.
And most of all, how to understand what each other is thinking and feeling...
so that we can LOVE each other with an open, beautiful heart.

Shawni Marie


  1. Girl, hang in there! It's wonderful that you and your boyfriend are both willing to explore new ways to open up communication. Let us readers know how you like that book once you've finished it -- I've of course heard of it, but never actually flipped through it myself. Does it hold up?

  2. communication is def. huge - i think in any relationship. that is so great that you guys are eager to learn how to better it. i think lots of relationships fail cuz they don't wanna learn.

    have a good weekend, friend!

  3. Aw, that's really cute! I think you said it perfectly: "A new opportunity to learn how to be a better partner for the person you love."

  4. that is so awesome Shawni! I think that is amazing that he has already read it. Another great one is the five love languages? Have you read it. I've gone through some classes on it and it was so very helpful!

  5. sorry to hear about the rough time you've been having, but i am so happy that you guys have decided to learn how to better your relationship, that's real great!! :)

  6. relationships are so very tricky, no matter how healthy you are as individuals and as a couple. i'm actually a marriage & family therapist and i usually recommend books by john gottman. he's amazing and has some of the best communication practices ever. i read and reread his books fairly often for my own relationship. tricky stuff, this business called love!

  7. You are absolutely right! It is definitely not always going to be perfect...what's perfect is when you can accept and love the imperfections of the relationship and realize that you will be together no matter what.

    Hang in there girlie <3

  8. everyone has given really great advice! you're on the right track with communicating and actively pursuing to better the relationship. so glad it's not a one-sided situation either, because those are just unbearable and almost futile. and i also second the Five Love Languages book. it was a real eye opener for me and my husband!

  9. So would you recommend the book?